Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Labor Of Love

Hello everyone! I am a mother of 3 children now! Wow! I love it! I am so glad baby Coast is finally here! I want to use this post to explain in detail my labor and delivery story! So here it goes:

After waiting many weeks and hoping my body would go into labor on its own, my midwives suggested that I be induced. I had a c-section with the twins, so with this birth I wanted to try for a VBAC or vaginal birth after cesarian. I really did not want another c-section and wanted to vaginally birth baby Coast. The big concern with VBACs is uterine rupture. This is when the scar from the c-section comes apart during labor. There is great risk of great harm and even death to the mother and baby. This risk of uterine rupture, however, is very low. Being induced using pitocin increases the risk of uterine rupture, which is why I was trying to avoid it, but I was almost 42 weeks so the baby needed to come out! Plus I felt very safe being at a hospital where they would be closely monitoring me and the baby.

So Friday, January 20th I planned to go to the hospital Saturday morning around 11 and be induced. I told all my family and announced it on Facebook ha ha. Then I got a call Friday night form my mom saying she was driving out the next morning to come be with me and help me out. I was in total shock! She already come for a week! I was so incredibly happy though! It meant so much to me that she was coming out and I knew it wasn't easy for her. So with my mom coming and knowing I was finally gonna meet my baby soon, we were pumped and excited!

The next morning we were all ready to go and then I couldn't do it. I couldn't walk out the door and go to the hospital! I felt terrible and just had a really bad feeling about going in that morning. I needed more time. I told my midwife I would think about it more and let her know what I decided. After thinking about it a lot, I finally felt at peace about waiting until Sunday morning to be induced. So that was that! Plans were made to go to the hospital at 7 a.m. and be induced! And this time I really meant it!

So on Sunday, January 22nd Hayden and I left around 6:45 a.m. to drive to the American Fork Hospital. My mom was there to watch the kids until she dropped them off with the babysitters. We all knew my labor was going to be a long process so there was no rush to have her there right away. Hayden and I got all checked in and then waited for my midwife to get there. She checked me and I was barely dilated to 1 cm and about 60% effaced! I couldn't believe it! I was 42 weeks after all. We started the pitocin at 9:40 a.m. They start off very slow and slowly and steadily increase the amount every 30 minutes. Baby Coast was showing distress around noon and talk of a c-section started so Hayden told my mom to come and she got there around 1. My contractions started to get strong and painful around 3 pm. Around 4:30 pm my midwife checked me and I was 1.5 cm dilated! I could not believe it. I was so sad and discouraged. I had put in 7 hours and was having terrible contractions and hadn't progressed hardly at all!

They decided to put in a foley bulb. This is when they insert a catheter up into the cervix and inflate the end with water to about 3 cm to help dilate you. So they did this and holy crap! My contractions got more intense, more painful, and longer, which means my rest time between them got shorter! I honestly thought I was gonna die! I was shaking, crying, and passing out from the pain. I had really wanted to do a natural birth (which most of you know since I told everyone lol) but at that point everyone was telling me to get an epidural because I still had so much further to go. They were worried I wouldn't be able to have the vaginal birth I wanted without it. I finally agreed, but made them take out the foley bulb first. There was no way I was going to be able to to hold still with all the pain I was in. So they took it in and around 5:30 p.m. I had the epidural. OH. MY. GOODNESS. All I can say is that after that it was HEAVEN!!! The epidural made the experience amazing! I could relax, be at peace, enjoy life, get some rest, talk with my mom and Hayden, etc, the list goes on and on. After being in so much pain and then getting the epidural I can't believe I ever wanted a natural birth!! But I know all labor is different for women and all the benefits and risks and everything. Trust me, I know. I did tons of research! But my body was not progressing and I honestly could not go on without one. So that was that.

So once the epidural took effect, the foley bulb went back in, seeing as I was still at 1.5 cm!! I can't remember how long it took, maybe 2 hours, but the bulb did its job and got me dilated to 4 cm. Wohoo!! I felt good about that and though for sure my body would pick it up and get things going. They broke my water, hoping to get more contractions and speed things up, and put an internal monitor in my uterus. Around midnight my midwife checked me and I was dilated 4.5 cm. I could not believe it. I was crushed! I was so sad and disappointed. I could not believe how stubborn and slow my body was being! The bad thing was that Coast was not doing too good. He was in distress so they decided to take me off pitocin for about an hour to give him a break and then would start again, very slowly.

So I had a break for an hour and then at 1:30 a.m. we started up the contractions again. It was a delicate balance because I needed to have good strong contractions to have any affect on my cervix, but they couldn't be too strong and hard because of the risk for uterine rupture. So I was pretty frustrated. I was willing to take things really slow and be in labor for days, but we could only do so much if baby Coast wasn't handling the contractions well. After the midwife left I had a breakdown. I was just so exhausted with so many emotions and physically exhausted. I hadn't eaten anything or gotten sleep. My dream of a vaginal birth was quickly and painfully slipping away and I had no control over it. I cried and cried and tried to make sense of it all. I pleaded with Heavenly Father. Hayden gave me a blessing. Then I changed my attitude. Instead of trying to get what I wanted, I decided to just give in and accept whatever was going to happen. If I was to have a c-section then I would be ok with it. I made peace with it. I didn't want to be bitter or angry toward Heavenly Father. I knew He loved me so I knew everything would be ok, even if I didn't get my VBAC. I write these sentences like it was nothing, but coming to that point was one of the hardest and most humbling things I have ever been through.

Around 3 a.m. my midwife came in and checked me and said she couldn't find my cervix and that she thought I was complete. I didn't understand what she meant and she explained that she though I was ready to push! She couldn't even believe it so she asked the nurse to check me and make sure she was right. The nurse then checked me and sure enough she said I was completely dilated to 10 cm! I was in total shock!! I could not believe it! I was so ecstatically happy! I had given in and surrendered to having a c-section. We were all elated. They gave my body an hour to push baby Coast down on its own and then came in at 4 a.m. so I could start the active pushing. That hour I was just in shock and disbelief. I know Heavenly Father gave me a tender mercy. It was my miracle.

Around 4 a.m. I started pushing and at 4:48 Coast was born!! When he popped out it was the best feeling in the world!! They placed him on me and I was so happy! I was overcome with emotion. We were all crying. Coast cried almost immediately. He had lots of dark hair, which I was and am so happy about! I could tell he was a little guy, which was later confirmed when they measured and weighed him. He was 6 pounds 9 ounces and 18 inches long! It was the hardest and most wonderful experience of my life!!

I was bleeding extremely heavily and it was discovered I tore a ton on the inside! The doctor had to come in and they spent over 30 minutes stitching me up! It was quite the process and recovering has been slow and painful but it was all worth it to have my vaginal birth!! I am so in love with this baby! He is so cute! He sleeps alllll the time and is a champ at nursing. Nursing one baby is great!! I know Heavenly Father truly blessed me. I am so thankful for the experience and love being a mom to 3! I love all my babies! Pictures to come soon!

Saturday, January 7, 2012

Our Life

Hello world! Why is it so hard to keep up on blogging!? The thing that makes me really sad is this blog is for me, my family, and my posterity so you think I would be better about writing on it!! Oh well, I will keep trying! Things are going really well for the Gurmans at the moment. We got through the semester and Hayden did awesome! One B+ and four A's!!! He works so hard and is really smart! He only has two semesters left at BYU and will graduate in December! Yay!

The holidays were fantastic! We went down to Queen Creek, AZ for thanksgiving and celebrated with Jodi and her family, my parents, and Eric. It was such a great week! The weather was beautiful and our kids had a blast playing outside and with their cousins everyday.

We drove to Bakersfield, CA on December 14th and got there on the 15th. Eric showed up the next night. We all had a wonderful Christmas! There were lots of fun surprise presents, one of which was the xbox 360 kinect I bought for Hayden (and our family). It is really fun to play and I figure it is better to be up moving around than sitting on our bums just watching TV or something. It was so nice to spend some intimate quality time with my parents before all the rest of the siblings showed up the day after Christmas. Then things got crazy! 9 grandkids equals a lot of screaming and running around ha ha. All the cousins have so much fun playing together. Oh yeah and we got to talk to Brian on Christmas day, which was awesome!! He is doing great and his french is so beautiful! I can't wait for him to be home in August!!

Hayden and I had decided earlier that we were going to leave Bakersfield and go back home to Provo before New Year's just because I was over 38 weeks and didn't want to risk going into labor at my parent's house, although I think they all wanted me too! So we drove back home on Thursday and since then every day we have spent cleaning and organizing and just getting everything ready for baby Coast to get here! We went through all the baby boy clothes and got them all ready and it made me soooooooo excited to meet Coast! I want him to be here already!!

My due date is tomorrow, January 8, hence I will be 40 weeks!! I really hope I go into labor soon!! My parents are driving here today and then my dad leaves Tuesday and my mom will be here about a week! I am so excited to see them and hope that I have the baby while my dad is here! He's going to carry his name after all (Coast Mark Gurman). Have I mentioned I am doing a natural birth!? Ha ha, well I am! I will deliver at the American Fork hospital, but with no pain medications. Julie is probably going to come when I go into labor as well. She's never seen a live birth so mine will be her first! Hope it goes smoothly!! Well, I think that's it for now. School has started up again and Hayden has a really good schedule and good classes. Our twins are doing great and are so adorable and so smart. They learn new things everyday and I can't wait for them to meet their new baby brother!

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Our Life At The Moment

Hello! I can't believe it has been so long since I updated our blog! Well, Hayden finished off being a Manager for Ecofirst Pest

Control in Sacramento for the Summer. It was a hard summer for me, taking care of the twins and being pregnant. I was basically

a single parent, which was hard! So glad I was able to go see my parents in Bakersfield about once a month. After the summer, we

went down to Bakersfield and my parents watched our twins for a few days while we vacationed in a beach house in Morro Bay! It

was so so fun to be together and relax and enjoy each other's company. Then it was time to head back to good ol' Provo! We kept

our old apartment so moving back in was not that bad, which was way nice! Hayden is a full-time student at BYU this semester,

studying Communications, emphasis in advertising. He has full plate with 5 hard classes, but somehow we are making it

through!

We are almost half-way! Yay! It is definitely better not having me be in school!

I am almost 29 weeks pregnant! It is going by pretty fast and I am way excited to meet and hold this baby, but also way

nervous at the thought of literally pushing it out of my body! Ouch! Yes, I had a c-section with the twins, but with this baby I

am going for a V-BAC, or vaginal birth after cesarian. Originally, I wanted to have like a home birth water birth all natural, but

now have decided on going through a midwife, but will be delivering at the Utah Valley Regional hospital in Provo. I have mixed

feelings about this. It is not my ideal situation, but I feel it is better to be safe and be in a safer environment in case anything

happens or in the event of an emergency. I am still planning on going natural (yep, that's right, no epidural!!) so we will see! I

am due January 8th and am having a BOY! I am so so excited. We are naming him Coast. Love it or hate it, it's fine. I had to

get used to it, but Hayden has been in love with the name for a loooong time and it means a lot to him, so there ya go.

So this is our lives right now. Hayden goes to school. I take care of the babies. Stay tuned for a separate blog post on

them! It's hard to imagine we are going to be a family of 5 in less than 3 months! Yikes! Can't wait though! UNtil next time!

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

My Angels

Ok, so this post won't be as good as it could be because I don't have pictures of my sweet little babies at the moment! But I will upload some later. :) So this post is all about my kids!! Beckham and Ellery. I just have to take some time and write all about THEM because they are amazing!!

Beckham:

-Looks more and more like a little boy and less like a baby, which is kinda sad for me, but also adorable

-Got his first haircut!! His curls were getting a little out of control so I went to chop town! Yes, I cut it myself and it looks sooooo cute!!!

-Has the prettiest golden brown hair color with blonde highlights from the sun

-Copies everything he sees from people or on TV like me when I'm working out or when they sing head, shoulders, knees, and toes on baby einstein

-Loves to brush his hair, brush his teeth, pretend to talk on the phone

-LOVES the water!! He loves bath time and loves to swim in Nana's pool! His favorite thing is to jump into the pool, yes, JUMP! He's a maniac and is not scared at all!

-Has the cutest walk I've ever seen. He struts around like he owns the world while his head bobbles around and his big cheeks jiggle with every step!

-Likes to tackle, body slam, and basically abuse Ellery

-LOVES loves loves his Daddy and thinks everything he does is hilarious!! No one makes him laugh harder than Hayden. You can see the love and adoration in the way that he looks at Hayden.

Ellery:

-Is my little princess!

-Is a blondie, which is really pretty on her

-Started walking about a month ago!! She did it pretty suddenly and LOVES to walk around. She lets me hold her less and is more independent since walking.

-Is still very small! I think she barely weighs 20 pounds!

-Is quite a spaz

-LOVES Nana and Papa

-Loves clothes! Such a girl already! She will find clothes and then walk around with them all day trying to put them on. Yesterday she had my sports bra wrapped around her neck and arm almost the entire day!

-Is very smart and figures things out very quickly, like phones, new toys, electronics, etc.

Can I just ask, does every parent think their kids are this stinkin adorable!!?? Holy moly! I can't get enough of them and I just think everything they do is so funny and so cute! Their smiles literally melt my heart every time and light up the room! They are both so smart and pick things up very quick! They are very aware of things going on around them. They will go to almost anyone. They are not that scared or timid. They think the weirdest things are hilarious. They love little kids. They love food and love to eat. They love playing outside. They love taking walks in their stroller. I put them both in the cart when we have to go shopping and they are always good. They take just one nap a day in the late morning/early afternoon. They love music, singing, songs, and dancing. They love Elmo! They love bananas and grapes! Well, I think that's it. I just wanted to write about them so I can look back at this and remember them at this stage. I feel so incredibly blessed to be their mom every day!! I love them so much and experience true and pure joy being with them!!

(*NOTE- ok, so listen. I know some of you might be gagging reading all of this and be thinking "Oh brother, this is so unrealistic and life is not really like this." Of course being a mom is the hardest thing I have EVER done and I have moments of anger and frustration with my kids! Life is not always rainbows and lollipops, but that is not the point of this post! The point of this post is to record the things my kids are doing right now and express my love for them! Maybe in the future there will be a post about the hardships and trials of being a mom and how sometimes my kids annoy me...but this is not that time! So enjoy this post about how amazing it is to be a mom and how adorable and sweet children really are!!!)

WE'RE ALIVE!!

Hello!!! Anyone there...anyone!? Sooooooo yeah, I've been gone forever! I'm sorry! We're just so busy and blah blah I know I know. Anywho, I'm here now and ready to update on what's been going on with the Gurmans! :) Here are some things that have happened since my last post:

-I graduated from BYU!!! Ahhh I'm so excited, but I think it still hasn't really hit me that I won't be going back in the fall

-Hayden and I decided to keep our apartment in Provo so we can come back to it after the summer. This allowed us to leave a lot of stuff at home, which made packing way better! But the best part is that we found sub-letters for the summer! It is such a huge blessing and worked out perfectly. The couple literally were living in a hotel with only suitcases and are going to be in Provo till the end of August, so they are living in our furnished apartment for the summer and paying us rent! Such a huge blessing!!

-We moved to Sacramento, California! For those of you who don't know, Hayden is doing summer sales again this summer for EcoFirst Pest Control. He is managing an office and selling of course. I really like Sacramento and Hayden is doing good and is an awesome awesome manager!! What I really like about being here is that my parents are 4 hours away in Bakersfield!! I've had the chance to see them quite a bit so far this summer and I love it!

-Oooh, this is kind of a big deal...we switched from T-mobile to Verizon and I got an iPhone!! I know, gasp! I always said I would never have one, but we got it for a good deal since we were new members and we LOVE it!! Verizon is awesome and so are our phones!!! We love video chatting while Hayden is gone!!

Well, I think that's about it! I can't really think of anything else exciting or that would be considered big news that I would want to share with friends, family, and loved ones....so that's all for now! Pictures will come later when I find our camera!

Monday, April 11, 2011

BlOgGiNg ThRoUgH pIcTuReS!!!

Here is my beautiful girl Elle!


My cousin Brooke gave us a TON of ADORABLE girl clothes, accessories, and shoes! This was the day we went through it all!


Who wouldn't want to wake up to this face!!


Ha ha here is my little ham Beck! I love the way he shows his two bottom teeth!


I love my little muscle man!


Ellery enjoying her pink birthday cupcake!


And Beckham enjoying his green birthday cupcake!


Hayden got in on the birthday action! March 15th, Elle and Beck's birthday! Can't believe they are ONE!


I don't know what they put in that frosting, but they had some crazy colored poop the next day!


Dinner time!


Thankfully, feeding time isn't always this messy! (They get the most messy when dad feeds them :))


Love Elle's giant smile! She must get it from her parents!


And I love those big eyes!


Beck started standing by himself and now walks around a bit too!! Growing up so fast!


Love hanging out with my sweet babes! Especially in the morning when they are so happy!


Look at that hair!


Ha ha love this boy!!



Ha ha funniest face ever!




This was the first time I actually did something with Elle's hair! Isn't it cute! Two little pigtails!


And this is how much she liked having her hair done...


Wow! What a crazy couple of months it has been! The semester is almost over and I am almost graduated! Hayden has been very busy with school and recruiting and training for his job as a manager for Ecofirst Pest Control. We're headed to Sacramento, CA this summer! Elle and Beck turned one! It was an emotional day for me, thinking back on all we had gone through in the past year, but I can honestly say I have never had so much joy! Twins are SO much work, but I love them so much! They are the sweetest funniest little babies and I love being their mother! Like I mentioned above, Beck is walking! It is the cutest thing ever! It totally catches me off guard though when he strolls wobbly past me! Who knows when Elle will walk! They are healthy and happy and are doing great! We have truly been so blessed. Hayden has been accepted into the Advertising program at BYU so now he has about two years left! I don't mind at all. I love my family so much! Hopefully I'll keep up-to-date with our blog for the Summer!! Talk to you soon!

Sunday, January 23, 2011